The Chinese-Malay Affair

Okey la since I am quite free today, let share the story about how I was asked to wear 'tudung' for my Muslim Card. No offend ya. This is just a sharing, so that I hope it won't happen to others, especially the new comer like me.

So there was this day I went to one of the Islamic office to register as new comer. After registration, I was asked to meet an officer to choose a new name. That was the moment where we (my husband and I) had an argument with the officer about the name we had chosen long ago. (See my previous post) I was a little upset with the way the officer trying to convince us that "Jessenia" is not a Muslim name. Sorry to name is as rude.  He did Google the name on the spot but sad to say he's insisting that the name cannot be used as it is a Spanish name. Well one name can be used by different country right? It is also stated "Jessenia" is an Arabic name and mainly used by the Muslim. Sigh~ For me, whatever it is, it's just a name. What most important is my heart to the religion, not the name.

Back to the topic I wanna share about the wearing "tudung" (headscarf) story...

Okey done with the name changing. I was asked to go another section to take photo for my Muslim card. At the counter, I greeted the lady with "Assalamualaikum...", without answering me she passed me a "tudung" and asked me to wear. Honestly, I didn't know how to wear the tudung. Without asking more, I took the tudung and tried to wear it. Since it is just a plain scarf (not the one main sarung saja), I just simply put it on, slung the tips crossing each other on my shoulders. No mirror is provided so I didn't know how do I look like or whether am wearing it correctly. So when I thought I am ready to take photo, the lady again said "Eh..pakai la tudung tu baik-baik sikit. Rambut you tu, jangan bagi keluar. Pakai tudung pun tak reti macam mana nak jadi saudara baru." Again I keep quiet. I was so frustrated at that time, I really wish she will lend me a hand to put on the tudung nicely. Instead of helping me, she just stood at one side looking at me, with her restless look. Until today I am so sad when thinking about it again. Though I was hurt with the way I was treated but that's doesn't mean I hate the Malays or Muslims. These people are just the minority cause I have met many nice Malay friends and they are so helpful too. :) Again, it's just a sharing, hope no one get offended k..^^

Well, to share another story...

I have few friends were in relationship with Malay guys. Just take one as example. Been together for 5-6 years, but end of the day my friend need to choose between family and love. Since she is born in a strong belief in Christianity, she got no choice but to let go her love. Trust me. They were in pain now. This is very sad. They were letting go not because there's no more love, but not to hurt. It was unfair isn't it? Will this and the cultural differences make it less likely for many out there to survive as a couple?Who should get the blame? NOBODY. Cause love is never wrong, just us the human.

The fundamentals of love are romance, companionship, understanding and support. You have to believe these cross cultural boundaries, if you really believe in true love. Have a pleasant day all. Merry Merry Christmas!

Ada orang kata orang cina dan melayu tak boleh kahwin..

Weird huh? Why when the chinese or the Indian go with Amor or Nigro nobody will make huu haa ah?!I hope I didn't sound so racist, if yes I would be the last person to be said as a racist, as I myself married to a Malay and happy with my choice..♥

Whenever a chinese girl go with a malay guy, the entire world seems looking at two aliens holding hands.(Not that bad actually, at least you feels like a not-so-famous artist at whatever streets you passes-by.haha) I remembered when I was in high school, one aunt told me "you can go with any guy, whatever guys, but definitely not the Bajau." Well what she meant is don't go with the Muslim, right aunty?:) What's wrong with that anyway? Isn't that so racist? I don’t call certain someone racist but without proper understanding on certain topics, people will tend to have a wrong perception of certain something.

Yes again..what makes the chinese or other races get so paranoid? The problem is not really with the Malays but rather with Islam. As what we aware of, the Malaysia Marriage laws are kinda strict, and the non muslims would have to submit to the Muslim according to Islamic marriage laws. If we were to compare, the intermarry is easily done in other countries, but not Malaysia.

As a half-blooded Chinese, I understand what makes the Chinese feels so scared of letting their children to marry a Muslim. First, they thought their children is not allowed to eat same table with them anymore since the food is not halal. Yes, indeed there will be changes in the lifestyle, but not dramatically as they think. Relax..It's not as bad as you think people. Islam is a beautiful religion. Convert to Islam doesn't mean you become Malays.  Islam is not equal to Malays. No such thing as you must wear baju kurung or totally lost your identity as Chinese or your original race after convert. You'll always be the same, just the belief is now different and need to be a extra careful with the food we choose. Yes to cover "Aurat" is compulsory but there is no force in Islam. The religion itself can't force one if you are not ready for it. The day will come when your "Hidayah" is there. Take it easy, learn it slowly. Islam is a universal religion, no matter who you are, the Arabs, Malays, Indonesians, Chinese, Indian (anyone, anybody) can believe in the same faith, which is Allah SWT. I know sometimes there'll be misleading in religion, just like how I was forced to change my name to "so called" Muslim name as the staff said "JESSENIA" is not a Muslim name, just because he never heard the name before. It was sad a new come like me being forced for something that I am clearly know I am at the right side. The staff even says " If you suka sangat nama ni, you letak la. Kita tak tanggung if ada apa-apa problem in future." :( 

Share with you next time how I was treated when I was asked to wear tudung before taking photo for my Muslim card. Don't get me wrong ya. I don't hate the Malays. Never! I am married to one lei..! And I am proud to have one..♥

Ok back to the story....

I believe many out there might be facing the same problem. With my 10 years relationship with a Muslim guy, I am definitely say "GO FOR YOUR LOVE, PEOPLE!!" but remember never hurt.  Yes it is ok for us, but for our parents its an entirely different story. No matter how big is the firewall, do not hurt their feelings. Seek for their blessings and approval. Try to talk nicely and prove to them that not all Malays are bad. (Sound like Chinese/Indian/Kadazan/other races are all very good huh..Don't like that la aunty..bad people whatever race also got mah...) I think it is up to us to change their stereotype because Malay or not, we are still human.  Nothing should stop one from falling in love, not to mention religion. 

End of the day, the power of love still lies in your hands. You need to rationalize the situation and think if its worth it. Make a decision that you won't regret. I know this is going to be a tough decision. Stay strong, stay with your love. That's your fate!

Check out the MV below! Love it as that's what I has been through since I choose him to be part of my life! Enjoy~

November Trip to Keningau!

Oh! I love my trip to Sabah this time! Oh shall I say every-time?LOL Where is Keningau? Well this is my second trip to Keningau if I am not wrong. The first trip was long long time ago until I couldn't recall what am I doing there. Basically I have no idea how the route would looks like. Sorry didn't manage to capture the scenery along the way to Keningau, but what I can exactly recalled was the fog! Before reaching Keningau, we need to passby Tambunan. It was covered with thick foggy all the way up to Tambunan and the whether was chilling cold. Since Eng is familiar with the roads, so she drove us this time. So grateful for the good chatting time while we were on the way to Keningau..:)  Btw, Keningau is the nerve centre of Sabah's vast interior division and land of the Muruts, one of Sabah's major ethnic groups. I was kinda surprise to see Keningau's town. It's bigger than what am expected! Large population too I assumed, with the traffic jam in a small town like this.

Though this trip is planned purposely for a friend's wedding, but it seems more enjoyable that I expected as I manage to meet my crazy girlfriend, Eng! It's always been a good time when we were together..miss u already oo Eng! XOXOXO

Us! Ready to fly!

The ladies! Ready for the party yo~

Eng Eng & Kollo, without May...

She's Conno. I am Kollo..^^

I hate the mustache!:@

4 people for 10 pax meals!

Us again!

Hahaha Damn boring...cam-whoring all night long!

The man with all the ladies..

Congrats to the newly wed!

Happy Wedding to Memei & Atun!
I wish you both just the very best in your future together!
God bless~

I love him, and him.

Hey you...wanna share a story with you..

Last night when I stepped into my house, I noticed my kaka is not in the living room. So as usual, I "Kakaaaaaaaaa..ni zai na li..?" loud loud..but surprisingly no answer. I am curious so I walked slowly along the living hall to each of the room, peeking from one room to another room (haha I sound like my house gt 20 rooms!). Then I found out he is actually busy ironing his working shirts...

Guess what..?!The naughty side of me suddenly triggered me to jump and climb on his body..!But when am about to start my mission, I suddenly stopped and stepped back. Why?

All because... ----> my husband is an IRON MAN! No. I am lying. I don't want Iron man, I feel sad if he needs to be one..:(

I suddenly feel so guilty that I hadn't iron my kaka's working shirts for long time...): I even couldn't recall when is the last time I do that for my hubby. Sorry ya...not because I am lazy ok..just that I am stuffed with office works. I need to carry bundles of joy home..(JOY??!!I wish lor!!) If I really stuffed with joy, I am surely will be ironing his shirt joyfully too right?! Too bad I wish someone out there who supposed to know this knows about how terrible it is to be overloaded with office works, yet it seems no appreciation is given. Maybe I should scold myself stupid for being so committed with whatever rubbish given to me then. BUT I guess no one wanna be stupid for the rest of their life, right? :) (You know what I mean...)Whatever I am doing now, I am doing for the sake of improving myself + my love to the children I taught..

Dear my lovely Kaka...
Thank you for always being so understanding, babe...
Thank you for the never-ending helping hands.I LOVE U

Btw, I would like to wish a very happy belated birthday to my beloved sister & to those whose born in the same day as her. May the new year brings many many good return to all of you people!
LOVE YOU GUYSSS!!!XOXOXO

Happy Birthday! 

Chubby cuppy cake boy

Oh My...He is incredibly cute! Happy holiday peeps!